Canoes Are Just The Beginning...

If you missed my Canoe post, check it out now and then read on...

There are no pictures for this one.  There really are no pictures FOR this one..

There was a camper who stated that she had such a boring life, there was simiply nothing to blog about.  I had laughingly told her that I didn't have that kind of a problem--there are PLENTY of adventures in my life!

Oh Boy!

The canoe happened on Saturday.  Father's Day was Sunday.

Father's Day dawned sunny and lovely with the forecast for high 80's and humid. 

I headed out to church after which I planned to take my dad and mom out for Father's Day.

Gman was out of town on business, so it was just me and my brother's family to take dad out.

My sister-in-law was recovering from knee surgery (which she emphatically denied me the pleasure of photographing the wicked looking knee of many colors and about 40 staples--Darn!). 

She had knee replacement about 5 years before and it had never worked properly since, so they went in to debride it with the possibility of another replacement. 

Thankfully, it didn't need the full replacement, but the incision was just the same as a replacement and with the extreme swelling afterward, it caused her to deal with not only the incision, but blisters covered the knee--both front and back. 

Okay--I admit it--when I saw it, it was so many colors that I sucked in my breath and said "Oh COOL!" which garnered me a rather sanguine look from her! 

AND the denial to allow photos...

After church, my brother called his wife, Nina, who said she wanted to try going out for father's day if we could stay close.  We all agreed that we would go to a local establishment so she could enjoy the day and not have to be out any longer than necessary.

Tom took off to pick up his wife and I took mom and dad to head to the restaurant. 

As we drove, I noticed it seemed rather warm. 

After a while it seemed HOT.

Then we noticed that only hot air was coming out of the vents. 

It appeared that the a/c had quit working. 

Time to go old school and roll down the windows.

Mom HATES the air hitting her, but...

The waitress who must have been new because she couldn't even get the drinks correct--uh, 2 unsweetened ice teas, 1 diet drink, 2 waters--NOT rocket science here...

The appetizers came after the salads and just as we took the first bite, the meals arrived. 


I took the parents home in the warmish Durango and headed back to the campground.

Monday, I was to take my sister in law to the doctor for removal (after an extra lengthy 20 days due to the blisters) of her staples. 

We took their Jeep since my Durango didn't have a/c.

Off we went and got just past the town about 16 miles away. 

The a/c decided to crap out!  Seriously?????

As we were noticing this problem, I noticed a police officer in the median looking for speeders just before the Forristell, MO.  As it is not my habit to speed, I ignored him.

Just as I noted the officer, the engine of the Jeep blew!!!!! 

BOOM!!!  Smoke everywhere!!!!

I veered onto the exit ramp and onto the shoulder of the exit near the top of the ramp where the engine stopped.

I asked Nina where the emergency flashers were as I didn't see them.  She told me after checking the manual.

So, with flashers flashing, I jumped out and opened the hood to see water and anti-freeze all over and the radiator hose blown off of the radiator--the hose wasn't blown, it actually blew off of the radiator itself.  (They later learned that the radiator had been broken at some point in the past and, shall we say, cleverly engineered back together so the radiator had to be replaced)

I jumped back in the steaming vehicle and called Triple A.

Nina called her son in law to bring another vehicle so we could get to the doctor to take the staples out.
The Motorist Assist guy came up to see if he could be of assistance.  Since I was on the phone with Triple A, I let him know we were fine and had a tow truck coming.  He kindly went to help with traffic.

VERY nice guy!!!!

Nina then called her doctor and was on the phone with them and I was on the phone with Triple A when the police officer that had been in the median drove up, blocking the intersection and then began to YELL at us and berate us for stopping on the shoulder of the exit ramp. 

I explained between his rants that the engine blew up and it was undrivable.  (Seriously???He couldn't see the smoke coming out and the emergency flashers and two old fat women????  Seriously???)

YOU HAVE TO MOVE THIS NOW!!!

I am on the phone with Triple A and a tow truck is on the way.

THERE IS NO TIME FOR TRIPLE A!!!!  IT HAS TO BE MOVED RIGHT NOW!!!!  I AM CALLING THE CITY TOW TRUCK TO TAKE IT AWAY!!!!

At this point I had taken about all I was gonna take from a young pup who was younger than my son!  Thoughts of Zsa Zsa Gabor began to dance in my head...

(some of you will get the Zsa Zsa thing and some of your are just too young...)

Me--Oh, I don't think so.

Eyes narrowed.

Mommy look on the face.

WELL YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE IT HERE!!!

Tow truck is on the way, officer.

IT HAS TO BE MOVED NOW!!!!

Okay.  Do you mind if I push it?

YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO PUSH IT AND I DON'T PUSH VEHICLES.  THAT IS NOT MY JOB!

(Didn't ask him to now did I?)

Where does it have to be moved to?

YOU HAVE YOUR CHOICE TO BACK IT DOWN THE ENTRANCE RAMP THERE OR TAKE IT UP AROUND THE CORNER PAST THAT LIGHT POST, BUT IT HAS TO BE GONE WITHIN 2 HOURS OR I WILL HAVE IT TOWED.

Okey dokey.

Motorist Assist guy had been witness to this barage from the young pup and offered to help me push it.

Officer--Well, see if you can get it to start just to get it around the corner.

Me--Okay.

(No luck starting it--Duh!!!!)

Officer--I guess I could give it a little push, but you won't be able to turn the wheel without the power steering.

Me--When I learned to drive, we didn't HAVE power steering.  (Quick yank of the wheel--tires turned)
Officer--I guess you can...

He and the Motorist Assist got it around the corner to where the pup was happy.  Sort of...since he had something to prove to us old gals.

Officer--Give me your license.

(gave it to him)

Officer--This your vehicle?

Me--No, sir.  It is her's.  (pointing to Nina sitting there steaming and calling the Doctor's office to tell them we would be late--no problem said they--get here when you can and we will get you right in, Nina.  Did I mention she works in the ICU at the hospital?)

Officer--I need her license.

(I thought, why?  What's it to you?  She isn't driving.  She doesn't need a license and YES, she is on drugs--you would be too if you had 40 staples in your knee that is the size of a basketball, pup.  Want her to pee in a cup, to????)

Nina handed over her license and as I passed it to him, I looked at the picture and I SWEAR!  I have NEVER SEEN a WORSE driver's license picture!!!! 

SERIOUSLY!!!!

It was BAD!!!!

Later, Nina said she won the worst DL photo in the hospital when they had a contest. 

No kidding!!!

I just started to laugh and handed it to the pup.

Officer--What are you laughing at?

Me--Did you SEE that picture???  It is the WORST thing I have ever seen!!!  (ROFLPIMP)

Officer--Do you always treat your mother like this?

I TOTALLY LOST IT!!!!!!  I mean, I thought I was gonna have to clean the upholstery for her I was laughing so hard!!!!

Me--Uh, she's my sister-in-law.  (snicker)  Been in the family for close to 40 years.

Officer--Guess you decided to keep each other then?

Me--Yup.  (Careful pup, that rod might actually be bending!)

Nephew pulls up with Nina's convertible and switches to the Jeep while I get out and Nina starts to hobble from the other side.

Me--Triple A has Okayed my nephew to stay with the car and he will accompany the tow truck and the Jeep.

Officer--I don't CARE what Triple A said.  Just get it out before 2 hours is up or it is getting towed by the city.

Me--K.  Thanks.  Gotta get the cripple into the car and get to the doctor to remove her 40 staples.

Officer--(shocked look towards Nina who obliges with a raised pant leg so he can gaze upon the loveliness of her swollen, multi-colored, heavily bandaged knee).  You WERE going to get her staples out.

Me--No we are going to get her staples out.

Officer--No, you WERE going to get them out.

Me--NO.  We ARE going to get them out

(back and forth a couple more times)

Me--Trust me.  The staples are coming out today!!!  (Nina muttering that they were coming out if she had to go get a staple remover kit and remove them herself--those buggers were coming out today!)
Off we drove (not speeding!!!  I swear!) and arrived at the doctor's office only 2 minutes late!!!! 

Can you believe it???  I was shocked!

Her staples came out.  She was relieved.

I was a bit uh, irritated. 

WHY do I always think of the snappy comebacks after the excitement is over?

Things like:
"Do you talk to your mother this way?"
"Ever need to go to the ICU????  Guess where she works?"
"Hold still so I can get a good picture of your face, badge and badge number, please."
"Isn't it Protect and SERVE???"

Oh so MANY things...

On Friday, my dad and I headed to the airport in dad's car to pick up Gman (since I had not gotten the guts to take it to Roger the mechanic--nothing scares me like a huge car repair bill!!!).

I get about 1 1/2 miles from the airport exit and what do I spy but red and blue lights flashing in my rear view mirror. 

I pull over.

Dad says, "how fast were you going?"

"I wasn't even close to speeding--I swear!"

Officer comes up and asks for DL and registration.

Asks if my address is correct.
Yes.

Then whose car is this?

I point to Dad and tell him that it is my Dad's car.

"Did you realize that your license plate is expired?"

"huh?"

Dad was too shocked to speak.  Hmmm...

"Yes--almost a year..."

Now I was too shocked to speak.

Every member of the family had been driving this car all over for the last year. 

Oye!!!!!

And, can you believe the officer didn't even ask for Dad's license????  I mean, after the experience that Nina and I had, I would have expected him to go for Dad's too. 

But no.  This officer was polite and professional.

Of course he was not a Forristell cop!!!!  Seriously--everyone in Missouri knows that you have to be careful around Forristell because the cops are vicious!!!  They don't care about the law--they ARE the law!

The officer gave ME the ticket in MY name.

Oye again!

We picked up Gman and made it home without further incident.

Dad's car now sports a current license plate.

Nina's knee is doing well this time.

Oh, and my A/C is now working the Durango.

The family felt I should bite the bullet and get it fixed rather than risk anymore of THEIR vehicles!

What was wrong with the A/C you ask????

A mouse ate the wire to the compressor.

But what else would you expect, right?  ;-)